How to Navigate Dating with a Chronic Illness
Opening up to someone you don’t know very well can be difficult, especially when it is about something that feels very personal. Chronic illnesses are not always going to be visible, and it is ultimately your decision when to disclose them. If you have been on a few dates with someone and you see the potential for a long-term relationship with this person, definitely consider having this conversation!
Telling your date about a long-term health condition can be scary, but you will feel so much better once the initial conversation is out of the way! Be confident during the conversation. They will mimic your energy -- if you come off as positive and strong, they will view you as positive and strong. If a chronic illness is something that weighs very heavy in the back of your mind during the first few dates, you will feel much better knowing that there is an open line of communication. After all, that’s what secure love is, a safe place to be vulnerable! Creating a comfortable and safe place for vulnerability will allow you to focus on other important aspects of a relationship -- getting to know their personality, their values, their aspirations.
If you want to talk to someone about this in more detail, and if you have any specific questions, reach out to me to learn more about chronic illness therapy
It can be anxiety-provoking to speak about something that feels very personal, especially on the first few dates. If you would feel more comfortable letting your date know about your condition before you meet for the first time, technology is on your side! Doing so via text, email, or phone call is a great way to give your date time to come up with meaningful questions to ask you and do some background research. Not only will this help you feel more at ease when the conversation ultimately comes up in person, but your date will feel more prepared to have the conversation as well!
Remember, your chronic illness does not have to define you -- you are so much more than that! Do not apologize for your chronic illness. It is important that you remember everything you are capable of. You are strong, you are resilient, you are brave, and you are enough. Confidence is attractive. If you are feeling insecure, do your best to focus on your best assets and use it to your advantage!
Loving yourself is the most important step in the process. Find ways to practice self-care and incorporate them into your daily life. Take some time to figure out what you love most about yourself. Maybe it’s your beautiful smile, maybe it’s your witty humor, maybe it’s your strength and bravery. Whatever it may be, let that part of you shine in your dating life!
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